Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Maybe I should stock up on the zinc oxide this Summer?

Because this is really getting sort of ridiculous.

1) DD2 informs me that I am no longer Caucasian.

2) I end up on a never ending mailing list regarding Hispanic opportunities in education.

3) and now Blogger sent me a message that (hooray!) I can now blog in my native Indic script.

My NATIVE Indic script? I wasn't aware that the ancient peoples of Ireland, England, OR Italy used Indic script on a daily basis... shows you what I know. It's starting to seem like DD2 isn't the only one not convinced of my primarily white European ethnicity. Not that this really bothers me - it's just that if I should be bringing curry to "Heritage Day" at the elementary school I'm gonna have to find a new recipe!

(I'm sorry as I know this is the third blog of the day. Some days blog material just seems to fly from all directions. Other days, not so much.)

Is it still wordless wednesday if I've already posted something for the day?

...probably. I can't even get that right!! It's OK. This was going to be a kind of a lame picture to post anyway.


He's laughing at me... I know he is.

I am a minivan mom. I never wanted to be one... but I'm really too short to deal with an SUV, besides - I'm the only person on earth that never wanted to own one one of those big old vehicles.
My girls sometimes ask to sit in the "way way" back of the minivan. Of course they can, because I remember this from when I was a little girl and my mom drove a station wagon. "Can we sit in the "way way" back?" You know, so you could ride backwards and make funny faces at the cars behind you? Well, now through the grace of tinted windows other drivers cannot see how weird my kids are being in the way way back of my van... but I do have a question. Is it possible that my kids are allergic to sitting in the way way back? Because every time they sit back there they seem develop some sort of sinus emergency and desperately need a Kleenex. Which, btw, are NEVER located back there because I'm always putting that seat down for some reason or another, and the Kleenex box gets moved back up to the front of the car. If I had half a brain, I'd make sure they took the box back there with them, but after having the children I only have 1/3 of a normal brain... so this never occurs to me until we are on a busy road where the children cannot unbuckle to run up front to get the Kleenex box. I've tried launching it back to them, but I either overthrow the darn thing (which means finding a side street to pull over on so I can open up the back and retrieve them), or I ping someone in the head. It's not that I feel so bad about that, because... well... you know, the Altoids type injuries I have sustained while driving.... but damn it all if I don't hate listening to the crying. The crying which makes my ears practically bleed (and me with no Kleenex box next to me because I've launched it at the children) also makes them need a Kleenex even more than before. Because we now have a horrible sinus drainage AND tears.

It is at time like these in my life I imagine I can actually picture the face of God.
And he's sticking out his tongue at me.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Curiously Enough...

Tangerine Altoids.
Curiously Strong, Curiously Sour.
And? Curiously painful when they come flying from the back seat of the minivan, ricochet off of your sunglasses and ping you in the eyeball.

Just, you know, for future reference.

Friday, April 4, 2008

Oh crap... he's leaving town again...

Found out yesterday that Husband will, indeed, be gone again next Tuesday. Which means that Darling Daughter 2 had better not pull this again. Do you think it would be out of line to threaten her very life, or - in lieu of her life her Littlest Pets collection - should she decide to try to prove to me again who is boss when dad is out of town?

You don't think she'd try that again, do you?

Thursday, April 3, 2008

The Crying Game...

OK, not the movie. My life today.

See, my hormones are - ummmm, fluctuating, shall we say? So, this morning when I decided I just needed a good cry (not for any real reason, just felt like crying) I shut my bedroom door, lay down on my comfy bed, and turned to the "John Denver" area of my ipod. Boo-hoo's followed. Some of his songs are more powerful than a good Hallmark commercial to me, but only if I'm in the right tearful place.

I did feel much better afterwards. Sometimes I think I just need to detoxify with tears. Is that even a real thing? Maybe I'm on to something here?
The Lamentation Detoxification Program.
(Doesn't that sound so much more beneficial than having some ordinary Pity Party????)

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

My Husband is One in a Thousand!

I think he's 1 in a million... but I can't actually prove that to y'all. I do, however, now have medical proof that he is One in One Thousand.

My DARLING husband had a vasectomy 4 years ago. 3 weeks ago I found out - the hard way - that it had failed. See, I've been having problems with an ovarian cyst for a while now, and was in for another u/s on it when the doctor asked me when the date of my last period was.

Me: Ummm, wow - I guess it was the first week in January.
Dr.: Have you taken a pregnancy test?
Me: No. Why would I?
Dr.: Because you missed your period, and you are having all the classic symptoms of pregnancy?
Me: Huh? No. My husband had a vasectomy 3 or 4 years ago. Besides, I'm not pregnant. I'd know if I was pregnant. I'm 43 years old, and I am NOT pregnant. My hormones are off because of the cyst. I couldn't be more sure that I'm not pregnant.
Dr.: OK, let's take a look.


Dr. starts the u/s, and lo and behold, see's an empty sac inside my uterus. (It was a blighted ovum... which is an egg that has been fertilized but fails to develop.) When I saw the empty sac I just looked at my dr. and was like, "If you tell me I'm pregnant I'm going to kick you." Dr. moves to the side away from my feet and tells me, "Well, now wait a second. I do see a sac, but it is empty. I don't see a baby, and I don't see a heartbeat which we would by now if your last period was beginning of January. We'll do some tests to see what is going on, but I'd say there is only a very very slight chance that you have a baby in there."


I did urine test in the office, and there were the results. Pregnant. I started to cry. Not that we wouldn't have gotten used to the idea... but you know how it is - we resigned ourselves to no more babies 4 years ago. Even if Dr. is sure there is nothing there... Oh My God. Pregnant? How?


I held myself together pretty well until I get out to my car, at which point I begin to hyperventilate and must find a friend to vent this out too. Mrs. Nielson wins the friendship lottery that day as I whip out my cell phone and start looking through my contacts, and she talks me through the initial shock enough so I can drive over and get my first round of blood tests done. (Note: All follow up blood tests showed falling hcg levels, confirming no baby actually developing.) When I got home my husband asks how my appt. was. "Do you want the bad news about ME? Or the bad news about YOU???" is my response. After I told him the news my husband was all, "Well, I guess that explains why you've been sleeping for a month." (He did also feel bad that he seems to have superhuman sperm mobility... but that might be another blog.) Ahh, yes. I have been awfully tired, and my boobs hurt, and I've been really bitchy and grouchy and "off". I cannot believe that neither of us thought I was pregnant, it just wasn't even something that was on our radar. I had already decided that I would just let the miscarriage happen naturally - since there was no emotional pain this time it would be just physical and although I knew it would be uncomfortable I thought "I can deal with that."
Right?
Ummm, yea. No.
As soon as the "morning sickness" (read: afternoon sickness which was bizarrely between 2 and 3:30 each day) kicked in the next week I was done. DONE. How did my body NOT realize that it wasn't really pregnant? I'm like some sort of fertility goddess at this point... and I really have no idea of how long this would have gone on - because when the doctor happened to mention that it tends to be more painful and there tends to be a lot bigger blood loss the longer your body goes without miscarrying, I basically said, "Sign me up. And, while I'm there you might as well tie my tubes."

So on March 27th I had a little surgery. Dr. also removed my ovarian cyst - which was actually big enough that he thought he might have to go in eventually and get it... so he saved me another trip to the hospital.

Now I just have a couple blood tests and some basic follow-up on my 4 little incisions and it's done.

Oh, and Husband MAY have to get his little procedure done again just for good measure. I'm not sure just having my tubes tied will hold back his Super Swimmers for long! (Besides, he might need a little bit of pain for my trouble?)

And? I have discovered that Vicodan is really a wonderful invention.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Things I thought I would never do #204

DD2 was sick yesterday. She woke up with an earache, but as long as she was on ibuprofen she was OK. Last night around dinner time - only about 3 1/2 hours in to her last dose of ibuprofen her temp started going up and her ear was aching.

Take her to the emergency room? Knowing that it was the night before a holiday I figured the emergency rooms would be packed... and we have a $75 co-pay for emergencies. It was an earache - we'd be there at the bottom of the list all night. However, the last time I ignored DD2's earache her eardrum ruptured that night and the guilt was bad. Poor child was in horrible pain leading up to the rupture. Frankly, I don't feel well enough right now to deal with being up all night with a crying child. (Yes, I am a very selfish person sometimes. God knew this when he sent these kids to us, so if he can deal with it I can too.) It was an earache. An ear infection (albeit a very bad one - as DD2 never does anything small. See previous post from earlier in the week regarding temper tantrum at soccer). I already knew that where ever I took her I was going to walk out with a script for amoxicillin and pain drops.

So... (here it comes...) I took my daughter over to Walmart.

Something you should know? I HATE Walmart. I didn't even like to buy my diapers there on sale when the kids were babies. I think Walmart is evil. However... there is a minor emergency clinic in our Walmart - called SmartCare - and if they take your insurance it's only $15 co-pay.

It was fine. Very quick. Very professional. And for a savings of $60 I walked out with exactly the same script that I would have at the emergency room. (I did have to locate a 24 hour pharmacy afterwards, since it was after 7pm which seems to be the magic hour that every single pharmacy closes in this town - and we didn't finish our appt. until 7:15.)

Would I take her to Walmart SmartCare for something important? Broken bone? Large gash? Breathing difficulty? No way. But, for the occasional weekend earache or questionable sore throat, possibly suspected pink eye? You betcha. Two thumbs up.

Add that one to the list. Maybe Walmart isn't so very evil sometimes.


P.S. An update on the soccer posting. I'm sure you all checked YouTube yesterday to see if I went bat-sh*t crazy yelling at my daughter for pulling some horrible tantrum again... but we were in the clear. She was perfectly behaved and had a great time at her game. I'll post pictures later. Is there anything in the world cuter than pre-schoolers playing soccer???

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Guess who's 5 year old had a tantrum at soccer today?

Oh, and guess who's husband (who is coach of this soccer team) was out of town and letting me fill in for him?

DD2 decided on her way from the car to the practice field that she was no longer speaking to me, was not going to participate, wouldn't look at me, dropped to the ground as if all the bones in her body had melted... and once I dragged her stubborn tushy the 200 feet over to the field she silently REFUSED to join practice. I have to start practice at 4. AT 4. Not AFTER 4, AT 4.... with all the other parents now watching to see how this power struggle plays out. Now, I might not have been so very pissed off - but for the fact that she kept running to hide behind pine trees so that I could no longer see her and had 5 other small, attention challenged preschool girls to work with. These children (ONE of whom has played soccer before) have their first game on Saturday, and the bulk of this practice was spent on them lining up and kicking the ball towards the correct goal. (This? Is not as easy as it sounds. One child is still convinced she is supposed to try to score on the goal that is behind her as they line up. She get is wrong every time.) Mostly they stand there watching the action until you yell for them to chase the ball, then it's pack mentality.

Husband won't be home until Sunday afternoon, so guess who is coaching the game on Saturday? You'll know if DD2 pulls this same crap at the game. You'll know, because there will be announcements globally (and most likely YouTube videos) about the soccer mom who went bat-sh*t crazy screaming at her kid on the soccer fields in Denver, CO.

Oh, the best part? When I asked her in the car on the way home why she pulled this behavior? She said - with a smile on her face, "Because you weren't letting me walk in front of you."

Holy. Mother. Of. God. This one? Will be 15 someday... God help me.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

So frustrating...

OK, y'all know how much I love a good book. I'm also usually very interested in books that have a focus on Spirituality. That said? I CANNOT get in to Oprah's pick, "A New Earth, Awakening to your Life's Purpose." I've even downloaded the audio version, as well as two of her podcasts with the author (She is really doing this book up - which is why I thought it would be such a great read. She's got online classes, interviews, forums. She's Presenting this book!) The genius is lost on me.

Is anyone else having a hard time with this book? Should I just put it down until things calm down a little in my life? Because, seriously... when someone is this pumped about a book I feel sort of like an idiot when I just don't get it. And, it's not that I'm trying to "buy into" the feeling of the book - I don't read these books necessarily because I agree with that they are writing about. I read them because I generally find all points of view interesting - and sometimes I learn from other's opinions. Usually they at least get me thinking, either in agreement or disagreement isn't the important thing. I like that they make me think and feel and search.

Life is weird right now, maybe chick lit would be a wise detour for me. Perhaps what I need right now is a bit of warm, funny, fluffy giggles. Because I? Am all about the intellectual side of life!!!! Right?

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

This? Drives me nuts.

OK, I realize that I have two daughters, and I'm not karmically doing myself or them any kindness in bringing up what I am about to bring up - because being judgemental is something I should refrain from and could completely bite me on the ass someday... but I'm going to have to rant about these two people:



Do you recognize them?

The one on the left is the formerly darling Lindsay Lohan. At age 13. Now, we all know that Linds has hoed a tough road these past few years, and doesn't look like the cute little pixie pictured here anymore... but at 13 Lindsay looked the part.

The one on the right is her sister. Who isn't actually the 35 year old divorcee with 3 kids and a townhouse with outrageously expensive monthly association dues that she appears to be. Nor is she the hooker that Gov. Eliot Spitzer was caught with - even though she could pass for that.. She is a 14 year old wanna-be actress. Let me repeat that so it can sink in... SHE IS FOURTEEN YEARS OLD.

Her mother? Needs counseling. Now. Not tomorrow, not next month... now. Because when your oldest child ends up in rehab with a failing career before she turns 21 you do NOT let your younger child out of the house looking like this. If I showed up at my daughters college graduation and she looked like this I'd be all like "Hell No" and I'd march her in to the bathroom and make her wash her face. If my kids start looking like this at 14 I'm moving to farm country and making them do chores like milking the cows and shoveling manure at 5am. I kid you not. (Can't you hear the conversation now? "Honey? I think we need to move. To the middle of nowhere. Because our daughter is a harlot and we need her to get some dirt under her fingernails. She needs to look ugly, and she needs to smell bad.")

Oh, and? The icing on the cake for me? This "child" is slated to be in High School Musical 3.

Which my daughters will BEG me to see.

Thank you, Disney, for yet another STELLAR casting decision. I owe you.

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Date Night

Husband and I had a date last night. We were originally supposed to go to a birthday party (which had a "theme", and I? Don't like "themes".) Short story long... he's got a cold and I'm feeling kind of blue lately - so we just did dinner and a movie. Besides, the girls had been begging for one of their favorite baby sitters to come over. They needed a break from us, too. (She is an AWESOME baby sitter, if you're looking...)

the movie we saw was "Jumper". Having not read the books (I'm sure I'll hit a sci-fi period in my personal reading life someday but it just hasn't happened yet), I was a little lost... and I HATE Hayden Christiansen (reminds me of those spoiled awful boys who went to my high school, with Keira Knightly being the girl version. He ruined the new star wars movies for me)... surprisingly I actually liked the movie. A lot. The only problem is that now, if I read the books, his annoying, falsely entitled face will be stuck in my memory as the main character. Maybe I'll start with the Griffin book - since that character was mysterious and I kept wondering where he came from.

Who are we kidding? I'll be sticking with chick lit and Oprah's pics this year I'm fairly sure.

Anyway. I liked the movie, and would even watch it again if it was on cable.

Also? I saw "The Nanny Diaries" on pay-per-view last week. (Jen, sorry! I should have told you so you could watch also!) It was VASTLY different than the book, with just enough similarities to make it recognizable. I liked the movie WAY more than the book - and that almost never happens.

You know what also almost never happens? Four movies in a month that I haven't seen before. (Which include "Harry Potter / Order of the Phoenix" and "Juno" that I watched on my Nano.) Hey Mrs. Nielson? Are you still up for the Boleyn's? I could possibly set a personal best since having children were I to make it FIVE!!!

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Crap, I missed Wordless Wednesday again....


Update on Sister and Brother-in-Law

They are doing great! My sister is going home tomorrow, and Brother in Law will most likely be home by next Wed or Thurs. He's in a regular room, and the kidney is working great.

My sister said she feels just great, as long as they aren't late getting her pain meds to her! (We? Are not a stoic bunch as far as pain goes. I wanted my epidural about the 7th month of pregnancy.)

Vanessa is right, it is an amazing thing that one person can do for another. After seeing how horrible dialysis was on him, it is such a relief that this is looking like a good outcome is in the future.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Oh... and this is funny....

One of the guys Husband was golfing with last week was this guy:



Jim Bray. Star of Roller Boogie (1979) with Linda Blair. (According to Husband, he looks nothing like this now.)
Husband said that one of the nights they were all at the hotel someone popped Roller Boogie in to the DVD - and that? Is some good shame right there!

March 5, 2008

My oldest sister is giving her husband one of her kidneys (the left one, yes - I asked) on March 5th. The surgery is pretty intense, and then he will be on some pretty strong rejection drugs. She will probably be able to go home on Friday or Saturday, but he will most likely be in the hospital in ICU for at least a week, with a possible 3 week total stay. (He is like a brother to me, they got married when I was seven, and I don't ever remember him not being around.)

Please keep them and their family in your prayers. They are grandparents to two darling little ones who need their Nana and Peepaw to make it through OK.

Saturday, March 1, 2008

The newest itard on the block

For my birthday husband got me this:
...which I think is the cutest thing ever! So, now I'm a complete itard with my nano! Last night I watched a movie on it, and it wasn't too bad. (When Husband is out of town girls have sleepovers in mom's bed. They watched Peter Pan on the DVD while settling down to sleep, I watched Juno on my ipod. Fair enough, right?) I'm addicted! I think tonight I'm going to watch Harry Potter Order of the Phoenix. The possibilities are endless - I could even watch movies in a warm bubble bath. They make a waterproof skin? Must investigate!

Now, if we could figure out a way to do photoshop on my nano I'd be the happiest woman on the planet!








Friday, February 29, 2008

I attended a memorial service yesterday.

We weren't close. I was very close at one time to her daughter - a part of their family and the babysitter of the daughter's two children. I only met her a couple of times.

Her memorial service was a celebration of a life well lived. Her children respected her, her husband deeply loved her, her friends will miss her, and her grandchildren are better people for having had her in their lives. She had a fun life full of games with friends, travel, times with loved ones, and faith in God. The greatest song that was sung at the service was "Sentimental Journey."

She died as she lived, surrounded by those family and friends she loved the most.

Mother of Suzie Strief McAfoos - a treasured woman who made a difference in my life from the time they moved in next door when I was 11 years old. Grandmother to Travis and JB - two darling boys who brought so many smiles to my life all during middle school and high school.

Barbara Strief.
Rest in Peace, and thank you for bringing so much love in to my life even though we didn't know each other. Your family was my family, and Suzie wouldn't have been there so many times for me if you hadn't been there so many times for her growing up. I will always be thankful to God for your well lived life!

Sunday, February 24, 2008

This Damn Virus: Day 11

OK, I've officially had enough. ENOUGH. Were it not for the invention of Mucinex DM I would have lost my mind by now... although the end may be in sight. My voice is returning to it's normal, nasally sounding vibrato as opposed to the throaty, phone sex, tumbled rock quality that it takes on when a virus invades my chest. (I would sound so much cooler if I smoked - like Kathleen Turner... but without the boozy nuance.)

Plus, why does this darn virus strap your energy so? I CANNOT get enough sleep, am dizzy about half the time I'm awake, and my brain feels short circuited.

I am ready for cold and flu season to be over.

OVER.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Some things in life are just wrong!

Like, when you have family visiting... they unpack their essentials in to your spare bathroom. (This part is fine, btw.)

You have to use the bathroom, and when you are done - while washing your hands you happen to glance over to your niece's make up bag.

When you are of an age where your NIECE has AGE DEFYING MAKEUP in her bag it is simply time to hang it up.

Game.Over.

Our next move won't be to a suburb closer in to the city... our next move will be to transitional assisted living.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

My brother turns 50 today

That means 3 of the 6 of us "kids" are 50 or over.


Half of us.


That is so scary! Thank God I'm going to be the last one to get there!!!!!!


Happy Birthday, Larry!!!!
Larry and his wife, Karen

Monday, February 11, 2008

How do I get on these lists?

…is it just me, or is everyone receiving emails from the school district about The Hispanic Opportunities in Public Education Conference? Not that I mind, but it might be more meaningful for me to attend a conference geared toward opportunities in public education for descendants of those who emigrated from the British Isles. During a potato famine! To escape religious persecution! Because this was the land of opportunity! Blah blah blah!

I’ll bet one of DD2’s preschool teachers is behind this!

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Oh Danielle.... the house behind me is for sale....


OK, so it needs some work... and it's a little overpriced at $265,000 , and we don't live near any great beaches or large bodies of water...
BUT it comes complete with a neighborhood full of pals ready to welcome your family to suburban america. Playgroups, coffee chats, swimming pool for summer gathering, and the occasional mom's night out. What do you say?

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Meme time...

OK - here we go.....

The rules for this meme are:
(1) Link to the person that tagged you.
(2) List the rules on your blog.
(3) Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
(4) Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
(5) Let each random person know they have been tagged.


Six Non-Important things / habits / quirks about myself:

1) I didn’t actually know that the spellcheck on Blogger was out. I just thought I was spelling everything correctly all of the sudden. Ignorance is the new black?

2) It is harder for me to make my husband laugh than any other person on earth.

3) I used to be really mean and judgmental. I’m still actually both of those things… but not nearly as much as before I had kids. I could be cruel at times.

4) I HATE it when I’m wearing long sleeves and the ends of my sleeves get wet. I will be in a foul mood until I change in to a dry shirt.

5) I’m an interrupter by nature. I, so far, have been unable to overcome this imperfection. It’s easier to quit smoking than to quit interrupting.

6) I used to have a girl crush on Kat Von D. Husband was a little too excited by this information. I’m over it now.

OK, I’m tagging Martha – who is going to get tagged 5 additional times, so she’s easy.

I’m tagging Rumour, because she is pregnant – and I love her for that. (I could talk to people who are pregnant all day long, it’s just the greatest! She's having a second little girl!!!!

I'm tagging Vanessa, because if she seems really really smart and if she lived in Denver I would want to be friends with her and I lurk on her blog a lot.

... and I'm out of ideas. Except for one. I'm tagging JH. My next door neighbor - who doesn't have a blog. But I think she should start one, because she is wise beyond her years and makes me laugh. A lot. Besides, she has 5 kids... that's a lot of material! (Hello you little lurker!)


Be happy.

Wordless Wednesday (a day too late)


Friday, February 1, 2008

I Heart NY

OK, to ease the inquiring minds... it was nothing as romantic as a getaway with my very handsome husband. One of my sisters was going to see another of my sisters who lives in NY, and asked if I wanted to go too. So, we jumped a flight on Monday and after our return flight was delayed (was supposed to get in around 11pm on Wednesday night) we were back in the wee hours of Thursday morning. (About 2:30am. Still tired and groggy!)

Sister and I did a lot of touristy things on Wednesday, so I'll have a picture post this weekend.

Missed you all, glad to be back! Picked up a new book while on my trip. It's called "Freakonomics." (Non-fiction) I'll let you know if it's worth the read. I'm also going to need a good recommend for my next fiction book, I'm not usually one to read so many works of non-fiction in a row!