My dearest friend is getting married! (Yea!) I’m very happy for her, but really thought – at 42 years of age – that I had probably passed out of the “Taffeta Bridesmaid Danger Zone” in life.
Apparently not.
Apparently you’re never safe, because THIS is the outfit she wants us to wear: (See photo on left)
Not to sound ungrateful, because I am really honored that I will be standing up for her at their wedding. I really like him and she is such a dear friend. That said, can you picture how gargantuan my ample boobs will look in THIS top (DDD)… keeping in mind that not only is it a halter, but it’s shiny ivory taffeta to reflect the light and make them appear to be two moons orbiting the planet Dodi. Which is exactly what I will look like in a Espresso Taffeta Circle Skirt. The Planet Dodi. Do I even need to mention my ARMS?
Wow. The wedding is in beginning of June. (So, you know, PLENTY of time to prepare!)
If any of you have any exercise dvd’s or equipment you’re not using, I’ll be accepting donations. I’ve already stopped eating carbs. Guess who’s going to be a little cranky for the next 2+ months?? You can bet that my first weekend after this wedding I will be organizing / hosting a party at Starbucks for lattes and danish!
Much love to you all, and hope you all get a good giggle out of this!
Dodi, the Bridesmaid