Tuesday, March 11, 2008

This? Drives me nuts.

OK, I realize that I have two daughters, and I'm not karmically doing myself or them any kindness in bringing up what I am about to bring up - because being judgemental is something I should refrain from and could completely bite me on the ass someday... but I'm going to have to rant about these two people:

Do you recognize them?

The one on the left is the formerly darling Lindsay Lohan. At age 13. Now, we all know that Linds has hoed a tough road these past few years, and doesn't look like the cute little pixie pictured here anymore... but at 13 Lindsay looked the part.

The one on the right is her sister. Who isn't actually the 35 year old divorcee with 3 kids and a townhouse with outrageously expensive monthly association dues that she appears to be. Nor is she the hooker that Gov. Eliot Spitzer was caught with - even though she could pass for that.. She is a 14 year old wanna-be actress. Let me repeat that so it can sink in... SHE IS FOURTEEN YEARS OLD.

Her mother? Needs counseling. Now. Not tomorrow, not next month... now. Because when your oldest child ends up in rehab with a failing career before she turns 21 you do NOT let your younger child out of the house looking like this. If I showed up at my daughters college graduation and she looked like this I'd be all like "Hell No" and I'd march her in to the bathroom and make her wash her face. If my kids start looking like this at 14 I'm moving to farm country and making them do chores like milking the cows and shoveling manure at 5am. I kid you not. (Can't you hear the conversation now? "Honey? I think we need to move. To the middle of nowhere. Because our daughter is a harlot and we need her to get some dirt under her fingernails. She needs to look ugly, and she needs to smell bad.")

Oh, and? The icing on the cake for me? This "child" is slated to be in High School Musical 3.

Which my daughters will BEG me to see.

Thank you, Disney, for yet another STELLAR casting decision. I owe you.


Vanessa said...

I'm 32 and I think I look younger than she does! Wake up mom!

tz said...

yeah, and that's going to be the 'ideal' woman for my boys...either way it's not good.

The country is sounding really good right now. Myabe we should go tv-less...ha, like that would go over well

Rumour Miller said...

Great post... I have nothing further to add.

Jennifer McKenzie said...

Would you like to talk about Brittany's family now?
No one has their back. When all of these women unravel, everyone is just in it for the exclusive.
It's so damn sad.

Sitting in Silence said...

Yes...3 cheers for Disney......NOT !

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Dodi said...

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Dodi said...

Jennifer, I already dissed on Brit's situation. December 2007.

I'm a snarky bitch I'm afraid.