Do you ever watch the show "Clean House"? (I think it's on the Style channel.) I was watching the other night, and this woman started crying when she sold a cabinet that her mom (who has since passed away) had given her. Niecy Nash (the host) asked, "Are you sad because it's something she gave you?" and the woman shook her head. "No. It's just that I miss her so much."
Before I lost my mom, I would have thought what Niecy was thinking... that it was the THING that mattered. However, that wasn't it at all - that cabinet was just the subtle reminder. It's the fact that she isn't here anymore, the "it's just that I miss her so much", that makes your heart ache.
DD2 finished up Kindergarten this week. The the ceremony was cute, the kids were excited... and I cried. Not just because my baby is growing up (although I am a sap about stuff like that) but because, as they did when DD1 finished Kindergarten, Mom would have attended with Dad (who happened to be in Alaska, so he was also unable to attend). She would have enjoyed sharing in the milestone.
"It's just that I miss her so much."